The Lee Letters These letters have been hard to write but the benefits have surprised me On the ways we create to connect and belong ↓ I started this writing project, The Lee Letters, in June of 2026 after a couple friends told me they’d like to read my writing. (It took me a while to realize that I’m actually an interesting person. Other people had to tell me that I was and encourage me to share my stories.) For context, I’ve been a writer my whole life. Journaling as a kid, a writing degree...
16 days ago • 3 min read
The Lee Letters Five decades of food and body noise what if a shot could finally shut it up? ↓ I can’t remember ever liking my body. I’ve never felt at ease with the way I look, no matter the cut of my jeans or the drape of my shirt. I turn my body sideways in photos to try to look thinner and I delete photos if I think I look fat. When I’ve gained weight, I’m embarrassed to see people who I haven’t seen for a while. Will they judge me? I’ve never, not even when thin, enjoyed being in a...
24 days ago • 4 min read
The Lee Letters Welcome to hormone hell The not nice things I have to say about HRT and women's health in midlife ↓ I’m on at least 3 text strings with other midlife women who ask each other where they are getting their HRT (hormone replacement therapy) patches. The U.S. is in short supply. My own prescription for the only brand that sticks to my skin is backordered until mid-December, which ain’t going to work for anyone, so I switched to the cream. I hate the cream: it’s messy,...
about 1 month ago • 5 min read
The Lee Letters Am I ok if my son is not? What I’m learning about caring versus carrying ↓ I FaceTimed my son last week and within 4 minutes I had mentally assessed his health, his level of anxiety, whether he was hanging out with friends enough, how he was doing in his classes, and whether I should be concerned that he seemed unconcerned about any of it. You know, just a casual chat with Mom. I’d called because I needed to see him and know he was ok. I was feeling that bad vibe associated...
about 1 month ago • 4 min read
The Lee Letters I was so nervous to visit my son this weekend and I realized I was taking the wrong version of me along ↓ I was twisted up about this weekend's visit to my son at his college apartment. He’s adulting now, but is he doing it in the right way? (Before you roll your eyes, yes, I already know this is an unsupportive and unfair question. Who am I to define how anyone else adults??) The truth is, I’m not really very confident that my 20-year-old son is capably keeping his house...
about 2 months ago • 4 min read
The Lee Letters Why deleting TikTok was a huge move in letting go and how I realized tracking my son closely was hurting me ↓ I track my son in more than a few ways: Find My Friends, his bank account, Instagram, Snapchat, TikTok, Venmo, Strava, and I’m probably missing some. I know some of you do, too, because we joke about it when we get together. We look at the apps when we miss them and want to feel closer to them, when we want to make sure they’re paying rent, when we don’t trust that...
about 2 months ago • 5 min read
The Lee Letters Two years into empty nesting, I'm still figuring out who we are We launched our kid. Now what? ↓ Two years ago our son gave us the “time for you to go” look minutes after we moved him into his freshman dorm. I cried for the first 20 miles out of town. We were empty nesters now. We were alone with each other. The past 20 years have been busy and, frankly, rough. I spent 2 full decades parenting, taking care of pets, cooking/cleaning/shopping, growing my career, maintaining...
2 months ago • 4 min read
The Lee Letters I've been left out of the reunion for years... ...and today's the day I stop caring ↓ My sorority sisters from college get together every year in a fun location to hike, eat, hang out, and connect. They put photos on Facebook of all their time together: matching hats, drinks on a lake, mountaintop hikes. Without me. I was invited at the beginning, 20 years ago, and I went once. It was a big group (I’m an introvert), a lot of drinking (I’m sober), and shared rooms (I need...
2 months ago • 2 min read
The Lee Letters I was born in a broom closet... ...and that kicked off a life of travel ↓ I was born in a broom closet in Arequipa, Peru, in 1971. My parents were not military and not missionary: my father had a job opportunity in manufacturing management at a Carnation milk factory and my mother taught English. They were 23 and 24 when they went. A couple years in, they had two babies, which is a bold move in the early 70s in a developing country, though I suppose that thinking is silly...
2 months ago • 8 min read